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Young, attractive female employees at businesses I patronize

10/1/2017

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The first time I had a significantly younger female employee at a business I patronize attempt to, and in her case, succeed in shooting me down was with a girl named Kate at a coffee shop in 2005.  The last time anyone succeeded in really putting that kind of hurt on me was in 2007 at the same coffee shop.  I decided to go to another coffee shop.  The new coffee shop featured a female employee who succeeded in shooting me down in 2010.  I'd just kind of gotten fed up by that, so I really didn't care that much either way.

This problem has only gotten worse since I quit drinking and drugs in a concerted effort to improve my relationship with women in 2009.  It has gotten even significantly worse since I decided to revive the "turn my back on love" experiment in 2012.  The better I get at hitting the curve, the more they throw the curve.  I'm pretty satisfied with how I field this stuff these days, even though it's a pretty constant presence in my day to day life.

So when any young or youngish woman fires a shot across my bow, how do I regard it these days?  I admit, I get my hopes up for a while.  I thought about this tonight.  Now, when a young or youngish woman who works at a business I regularly patronize fires a perceived shot across my bow, what is the nature of the interaction that follows?   

Well, since Kate in 2005, I have been on zero dates with young or youngish female employees of businesses I patronize, shot across the bow or not.  I have had zero young or youngish female employees show up at a music show I was performing at a club.  One time I had a single young female show up with a group from the coffee shop at an art show at my house down the street.  She acted like she was there to get her teeth pulled.  I still like her to this day, though, she was pretty cool.  I showed up at a music show of a female employee from a cafe I used to go to.  I followed the usual rules of etiquette and didn't try to monopolize her time, and I just watched her perform, had nice things to say about her set, and left.

So what, if any, is the nature of any significant interaction between myself and a young or youngish female employee of a business I patronize after they have, as I put it, fired a shot across my bow?  These days that's about all that really happens, what is most significant is all that does not occur.  I do not come into said place of business with a raging hard-on the next occasion after said shot is fired across my bow in the hopes that I have at last found the love of my life.  I don't ask them on dates.  I don't invite them to any open mikes I might play that week.  I gave a comic book to a young woman who asked for one some time back, but I don't think I ever regarded her as a love interest.  If she reads this, I hope to dear god she doesn't take offense, I just mean to say that I don't regard such gestures either by myself or someone such as her as the start of something big.

So, zero dates, and with no dates, not much else.  What if someone of this category actually took an interest in me?  What would be my advice to them as to how to proceed?  I haven't the slightest idea, because that has never occurred.  I could only advise them to explore other options, such as someone closer to their age, in their social circle, who shares common interests that would all combine to make getting to know that guy better a lot easier than getting to know me better.  I mean, I guess I'm congenial enough, but other than that, I don't know.
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