I invited a young woman to an open mike that I played tonight. She didn't show. She had prior commitments, but she said she'd try to make it, but she didn't. She works at one of these food service businesses that I patronize on a regular basis. I guess that makes me oh-fer-19 on the waitresses and baristas in my world now. I've been keeping a tally that goes back to 2005 and continues up to...tonight, I guess. The only reason that it's oh-fer-19 and not higher is that I stopped counting a while back, but I decided to pick up where I knew I last left off on my count.
What to do now? Well, the first thing I'm NOT doing is going to the business where this young woman works for at least two weeks or so. Why? Because the last thing I want to do is go in there a day or two from now and try to come off as a great guy to this young woman about being stood up and proceed to kiss her ass and tell her what a great person she is or any of that. Nope, not happening. I think that kind of thing is very manipulative to the point of being disrespectful.
The flip side of that equation involves unwittingly rewarding her for standing me up. If I go in tomorrow or the next day and try to come off as some great guy, I would give her "free" attention to the point where she might say to herself, "What if I just told this geezer to go piss up a rope? What would I get in return for that, if this is how he's acting in regards to me standing him up?" Nope, not gonna happen.
What I will do is wait a while, two weeks or so, go in and play it off as if none of that ever happened. That would include my offer to her to come out and see me play. If she doesn't say anything about any of it, I'll just leave it at that. Then, the only payoff I can see from asking her out in the first place and her just leaving it at that, is that I don't have to take her seriously any more if she comes off as super-friendly as she's been towards me previously. I mean, I've seen her act that same way towards other regular male customers, so I can just chalk up what I kind of interpreted as special attention meant for me as something more democratic on her part.
I want to emphasize this one point; I DO NOT in any way think that this young woman will try to retaliate for my overture towards her, and I appreciate her for that. I considered my invitation to her as a volley back into her court. If nothing comes back when I do go back in there, that will be the end of that.