My number one priority at this point in my deal with the Invisible Woman is to not go past the point of no return with her. In the summer of 1988, I made that same priority paramount with Sara, and I cut her loose. I had no idea that she had issues with her sexuality that must have run riot in her for a long time. I sacrificed any notion of having any kind of relations with her because I no longer felt that I could vouch for my ability to control my darker impulses in regards to her. I want to emphasize that this was not done in any nobel spirit of self-sacrifice, I was simply fed up with her.
I do not believe that I have gone past the point of no return with the Invisible Woman. I have not engaged in any abusive name-calling. I have not threatened, harassed, intimidated, or transgressively attempted to embarrass her. I have posted a couple of songs that range in content from snarky to lacerating, but as far as trying to bring her embarrassment; the fact that I have never mentioned her name, and perhaps more importantly, couched so many statements about her in terms of, "this all might be in my head," means that I have afforded her a modicum of personal privacy in light of the fact that she is a famous person.
Regardless of whether she actually knows anything about all of the stuff I have alluded to and talked about, I could still go past the point of no return with her. Regardless of how she actually feels about me, I could still go past the point of no return with her. Regardless of her relationship status, I could still go past he point of no return with her. Regardless of whether I actually meet her in real life or not, ditto.
I have such anger and resentment when, in more typical circumstances, an attractive young woman engages in the kinds of behaviors and attitudes that I have accused this person of engaging in, that I wonder if I do enough to distinguish between the person, a creature created in God's image just like me, and the distasteful things they do. In my own head after all, I certainly do engage in all kinds of ugly name-calling. But, this morning I thought maybe I don't give myself enough credit. A couple of posts ago, I mentioned that I congratulated the last one on her engagement and marriage, even though she tried more than once to make me over into the bad guy that she imagined me to be.
Regardless of whether my notion of this person exists. Regardless of her actual relationship status. Regardless of whether I actually meet her one day or not; now and for the foreseeable future, both she and I's safety and well being are more important to me than love, girlfriends, or relationships. It's just the kind of thing that mentally-ill-trash-like-me-who-is-less-of-a-man thinks about during these times. As of May 21st, 2017, you and yours entered my world, forever, babe. How do you like it so far? Insert appropriate expletive here.
I do not believe that I have gone past the point of no return with the Invisible Woman. I have not engaged in any abusive name-calling. I have not threatened, harassed, intimidated, or transgressively attempted to embarrass her. I have posted a couple of songs that range in content from snarky to lacerating, but as far as trying to bring her embarrassment; the fact that I have never mentioned her name, and perhaps more importantly, couched so many statements about her in terms of, "this all might be in my head," means that I have afforded her a modicum of personal privacy in light of the fact that she is a famous person.
Regardless of whether she actually knows anything about all of the stuff I have alluded to and talked about, I could still go past the point of no return with her. Regardless of how she actually feels about me, I could still go past the point of no return with her. Regardless of her relationship status, I could still go past he point of no return with her. Regardless of whether I actually meet her in real life or not, ditto.
I have such anger and resentment when, in more typical circumstances, an attractive young woman engages in the kinds of behaviors and attitudes that I have accused this person of engaging in, that I wonder if I do enough to distinguish between the person, a creature created in God's image just like me, and the distasteful things they do. In my own head after all, I certainly do engage in all kinds of ugly name-calling. But, this morning I thought maybe I don't give myself enough credit. A couple of posts ago, I mentioned that I congratulated the last one on her engagement and marriage, even though she tried more than once to make me over into the bad guy that she imagined me to be.
Regardless of whether my notion of this person exists. Regardless of her actual relationship status. Regardless of whether I actually meet her one day or not; now and for the foreseeable future, both she and I's safety and well being are more important to me than love, girlfriends, or relationships. It's just the kind of thing that mentally-ill-trash-like-me-who-is-less-of-a-man thinks about during these times. As of May 21st, 2017, you and yours entered my world, forever, babe. How do you like it so far? Insert appropriate expletive here.
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