I feel as if that situation I found myself in with that young woman I can go on and on about for these last three-plus years remains a "thing" for a lot of people in my world. It may remain a thing for that young woman, and it certainly remains a thing for me. One way I can look at this situation in light of this perception can reside in the notion that the reason it remains a thing to me, perhaps to her, and to so many others, comes from the idea that I did a really good job in dealing with this situation. So, "No good deed goes unpunished," as it were.
With this in mind, I thought about how, if I could go back three years and be me again in the days after she started in on me, and I said to that version of me, "If this deal remains an issue, perhaps a viable issue, three years from now, thanks in large part to your skillful handling of the situation, would you turn such a person as this young woman away if she reached out to you in some meaningful way? I, the version of me in April, 2022, very much wants to tell this person to go jump in the lake, but I thought I'd consult with you first. What do you say, April, 2019 version of Richard Alexander?" I think the April 2019 version of myself would very much advise against telling such a person as this young woman to go jump in the lake if she somehow, someway attempted to show up in my world in a positive way. On the one hand, she comes across as someone who definitely seems to have issues I find very troublesome, should I ever face the prospect of becoming intimately involved with her, but on the other hand, she comes across as just another young person looking for answers.
Other than that bit of insight, I feel as if my hands remain tied as far as any more attempts on my part to reach out to her. I've done my part in that, and, although it went very well in many important aspects, not the least of which involves how kindly she responded to my overture towards her, I feel that any attempt to reach out to her to a similar degree would probably undermine what I did manage to accomplish last October. If nothing further develops between us, I very much want that moment I had with her to remain a defining moment as far as what I tried to do to resolve everything between us in a constructive, sustainable way. I hope this blog post reflects the same spirit I showed when I reached out to her at her place of employment last October, and in that reflection of that time, only enhances what I want to remain the defining moment of my deal with her, instead of undermining or sabotaging it.
With this in mind, I thought about how, if I could go back three years and be me again in the days after she started in on me, and I said to that version of me, "If this deal remains an issue, perhaps a viable issue, three years from now, thanks in large part to your skillful handling of the situation, would you turn such a person as this young woman away if she reached out to you in some meaningful way? I, the version of me in April, 2022, very much wants to tell this person to go jump in the lake, but I thought I'd consult with you first. What do you say, April, 2019 version of Richard Alexander?" I think the April 2019 version of myself would very much advise against telling such a person as this young woman to go jump in the lake if she somehow, someway attempted to show up in my world in a positive way. On the one hand, she comes across as someone who definitely seems to have issues I find very troublesome, should I ever face the prospect of becoming intimately involved with her, but on the other hand, she comes across as just another young person looking for answers.
Other than that bit of insight, I feel as if my hands remain tied as far as any more attempts on my part to reach out to her. I've done my part in that, and, although it went very well in many important aspects, not the least of which involves how kindly she responded to my overture towards her, I feel that any attempt to reach out to her to a similar degree would probably undermine what I did manage to accomplish last October. If nothing further develops between us, I very much want that moment I had with her to remain a defining moment as far as what I tried to do to resolve everything between us in a constructive, sustainable way. I hope this blog post reflects the same spirit I showed when I reached out to her at her place of employment last October, and in that reflection of that time, only enhances what I want to remain the defining moment of my deal with her, instead of undermining or sabotaging it.
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