Like I said, the self-imposed restriction is off

Last week I approached that young woman i can go on and on about, that young woman who works at that one business I patronize, last week I approached her for social reasons for the first time.  This effort came after almost three years of having an interest in her for that sort of thing.  I did it, like I often said, in front of God and everyone as she busily worked her job.  For her part, she was very, very nice about it.  I'm trying to relate my version of what happened, because many might find my last post unfair.

My effort to reach out to her revealed my humanity to her, I think, and, if my past experiences indicate anything to me, the moment when I recoiled at the thought of how things really were on their end, and their likely attitudes towards me, a moment expressed in my last post of the prior evening, that expression of my revulsion strikes women such as her as a betrayal of them.  After all, they recognized my humanity in that moment I reached out to them, but I failed to acknowledge that recognition of my humanity on their part when I would so fearfully demonstrate a recoiling at what had gone on prior to that moment.  So the way they see it, typically, is that they recognize me, but I don't recognize them, when all is said and done.  I'm trying to do better.