Richy Vegas - The artwork and music of Richard Alexander
  • Home
  • About Richard Alexander
  • Comic Books
  • Music
  • Art
  • YouTube
  • Blog
  • Contact/Social Media/Patreon

It has been twenty years since my last crash and burn episode

4/16/2019

0 Comments

 
Issue number 4 of my comic book, "Anita, You're the Reason I'm Not In Prison," covers my last crash and burn episode involving the machinations of a failed love interest and her confederates.  That occurred twenty years ago this year.  The main lesson I took away from that episode was this: even though I was on psychiatric medication, even though I had a pretty good understanding of my diagnosis, even though I saw a therapist as well as a psychiatrist, and even though I had the support and understanding of friends and family, I could still have a crash and burn episode.  And so I did.

It's not been just my dumbass luck that I have not had similar to identical types of occurrences happen in these past twenty years.  I didn't have some magical medication change that solved this problem, and the world hasn't changed in this regard so much as I have.  I've encountered a lot of asshole women over the twenty years since June, 1999, along with their confederates, and my record in dealing with their shit is pretty good overall.  Over the years, bit by bit, I've gotten much better at taking care of myself.  First it was the smoking, then the drinking and drugs, and finally the issues with love addiction, which constituted the heart of the crash and burn problem in the first place.

I can't fully communicate here how much better my life has become since I taught myself how to thwart crash and burn episodes from visiting themselves on my being and my life.  Back before I received my diagnosis and treatment for mental illness, these kinds of episodes would go off in my face like Old Faithful in Yellowstone.  I could pretty much set a watch by counting on such an occurrence every six months, year, year and a half, or two years apart.  The interruptions to my life that these nervous breakdown episodes wrought....sucked.  That's about all I have to say.  I've been able to take on longterm creative projects such as my comic book series and the study of guitar and songwriting accompanied by the regular production of solo albums and solo performances, because my whole purpose in life is not wrenched apart by bouts of crippling self-doubt about whether I'm doing anything meaningful with my time and energy.

I think the impulse that motivated the antagonists in "Anita, You're the Reason I'm Not In Prison" stemmed from the idea that the results of their efforts would come off as really funny, because my reaction would come off as really funny, I guess.   In more recent times this one gal at one of these businesses would seem to get a kick out of what I would write about this or that situation I would find myself in, and she in turn, in my estimation, tried to yank my chain just a few weeks ago.  While it's true that I can come off as pretty funny at times when I write about some of these situations, I don't like people trying to orchestrate traumatic experiences just to see how I react.  That just comes off as really sadistic.

The decisions I make in the coming days, weeks, and months on whether or not to refrain from associating with individuals I find distasteful are not decisions I make lightly.  There have been several food service oriented businesses that I used to patronize regularly that I now patronize only occasionally-to-hardly-at-all because of such decisions I've made.  I don't regret these decisions at all, and I doubt that I will regret any decisions of that nature, should I decide to make them, in the foreseeable future.  That is all.

p.s. The decisions to refrain from patronizing these food service businesses where I encountered employees who behaved in a distasteful manner towards me; these decisions were made BY me and not FOR me.  Understand?  
0 Comments



Leave a Reply.

    Author

    Write something about yourself. No need to be fancy, just an overview.

    Archives

    March 2023
    February 2023
    January 2023
    December 2022
    November 2022
    October 2022
    September 2022
    August 2022
    July 2022
    June 2022
    May 2022
    April 2022
    March 2022
    February 2022
    January 2022
    December 2021
    November 2021
    October 2021
    September 2021
    August 2021
    July 2021
    June 2021
    May 2021
    April 2021
    March 2021
    February 2021
    January 2021
    December 2020
    November 2020
    October 2020
    September 2020
    August 2020
    July 2020
    June 2020
    May 2020
    April 2020
    March 2020
    February 2020
    January 2020
    December 2019
    November 2019
    October 2019
    September 2019
    August 2019
    July 2019
    June 2019
    May 2019
    April 2019
    March 2019
    February 2019
    January 2019
    December 2018
    November 2018
    October 2018
    September 2018
    August 2018
    July 2018
    June 2018
    May 2018
    April 2018
    March 2018
    February 2018
    January 2018
    December 2017
    November 2017
    October 2017
    September 2017
    August 2017
    July 2017
    June 2017
    May 2017
    April 2017
    March 2017
    February 2017
    January 2017
    December 2016
    November 2016
    October 2016
    September 2016
    August 2016
    July 2016
    June 2016
    May 2016
    April 2016
    March 2016
    February 2016
    January 2016
    December 2015
    November 2015
    October 2015
    September 2015
    August 2015
    July 2015
    June 2015
    April 2015
    March 2015
    February 2015
    January 2015
    December 2014
    October 2014
    September 2014
    August 2014
    July 2014
    June 2014
    April 2014
    February 2014
    January 2014
    November 2013
    October 2013
    September 2013
    August 2013
    August 2012
    June 2012
    May 2012
    March 2012
    January 2012

    Categories

    All

    RSS Feed

Powered by Create your own unique website with customizable templates.
Site Design Lipsting Media | ©2012 Richard Alexander | richyvegas@gmail.com