I'm Sorry

I wrote some songs last December when this woman in my world threw me a little bone of flirtation.  I like the songs, and even though nothing ever came of that, it's not as if I'm scarred by the fact that nothing ever came of that.  With that in mind....

I’m Sorry
 Intro: G, Em, D, C
Body of song: D, C, G, B7
Strumming patterns, intro and outro: B↓B↓
Body of song: B↓↑B↓

Intro:
G
Sorry to break the bad news folks
                 Em
I’ve got another turd for the pile
       D
I’ll try to sound tough like Johnny Cash
               C                             C
But ya’ might want to take a while.

G
To go for a crap or take a pee
               Em
Maybe step out for a smoke
         D
Maybe hit yourself in the head with a hammer
            C                         G
Then take a murderous toke.

Body:
     D
If love were a punch to the gut
              C
I’d be suckin’ for oxygen
     G
If love were just a silly notion
             B7
I’d be four months in the bin.

       
D
Don’t know nothin’ ‘bout that thin thin line
    C
I’m pretty sure that’s not true
       G
But if love were a backed up sewer line
             B7 
I’d be eyeball deep in poo.

Well a lot of people have a lot of court dates 
Over what we’re goin’ through
Many gold bands in a lot of pawnshops
For the sake of the truest true.

If love were a cycle men went through 
I’d be four months on the rag
My cup runneth over Kukichiyo
Someone bring me my sickbag.

If love were a bad name for a band
I’d call ours Hoobastank
If love showed up as hemorrhoids 
Oh baby I’d have you to thank.

    D
A guy like Shakespeare would write a sonnet
             C
Sweet music for an ancient ear
    G
I promise you baby I’ll get right on it
                   B7    (flourish)              D
But now my thumb is stuck up my rear.

B↓B↓
D                                              
I said my thumb is totally stuck 
C             G
Up, my, rear.


Richy Vegas 4/23/2017