It's bad enough that I harbor thoughts that Schmaylor Schmift sends men into my car and my apartment to steal stuff such as a Kinks CD or a package of soy chorizo, but now I wonder if a "real" person I know to exist, so to speak, actively wants to play a similar role. I refer to that former cashier from that grocery store, and how I wonder if some of the young women I interact with in my day to day life now somehow connect to her. Will I have some goddess type always lurking on the periphery of my life and my mind for the foreseeable future?
I get the impression that the former cashier really wanted to be something like that to me all along. I figure she just wanted to circle around me, always out of reach. I wonder if these interactions I've had with some of these employees at various businesses signal an attempt on her part to fully reclaim that role she possibly coveted when she worked at that grocery store.
The only problem with her alleged attempts to play the part of maddening presence in my life resides in what all happened when I had the balls to invite her to my comic book sale in October of 2021. Readers can go back to posts from that time and see several instances where I said my gesture served two purposes. The first purpose stemmed from a desire to get to know her better and all of that. The second purpose got right down to it; this situation would not go on forever. I feel as if I resolved the whole matter between us rather well, and she quit that job early this year.
Readers can go back to about February or March and see these entries regard her as someone in the past. I have no problem regarding my deal with her in the past tense. She can't just scheme and plot her way back into the present day with anything I may or may not have experienced with these other young women of these past few weeks. Like I said in my last post, my invitation to her to my comic sale stands as the "Citizen Kane" of outsider, fifty-seven year old men approaching twenty-two year old hotties for social reasons. The fact that nothing really ever came of that tells me everything I need to know about where I really stand with her. She can't just wish that moment away and go back to the way it was before.
I get the impression that the former cashier really wanted to be something like that to me all along. I figure she just wanted to circle around me, always out of reach. I wonder if these interactions I've had with some of these employees at various businesses signal an attempt on her part to fully reclaim that role she possibly coveted when she worked at that grocery store.
The only problem with her alleged attempts to play the part of maddening presence in my life resides in what all happened when I had the balls to invite her to my comic book sale in October of 2021. Readers can go back to posts from that time and see several instances where I said my gesture served two purposes. The first purpose stemmed from a desire to get to know her better and all of that. The second purpose got right down to it; this situation would not go on forever. I feel as if I resolved the whole matter between us rather well, and she quit that job early this year.
Readers can go back to about February or March and see these entries regard her as someone in the past. I have no problem regarding my deal with her in the past tense. She can't just scheme and plot her way back into the present day with anything I may or may not have experienced with these other young women of these past few weeks. Like I said in my last post, my invitation to her to my comic sale stands as the "Citizen Kane" of outsider, fifty-seven year old men approaching twenty-two year old hotties for social reasons. The fact that nothing really ever came of that tells me everything I need to know about where I really stand with her. She can't just wish that moment away and go back to the way it was before.
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