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I have a weird audience

5/20/2019

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One time my old band, Insect Sex Act, played Emo's in 2010 or 2011.  As we played, these three or four young women danced with each other energetically in front of the stage.  Just havin' fun.  The last thing I wanted to do after the set was try to talk to these young girls.  I thought it might have looked really uncool and presumptuous to try and pick up on them.  

As I go around in my world, I wonder if anyone has read those books on the zine shelf at the main library downtown.  I kind of pick up a vibe that some of the women I see at these businesses may have read the books.  I could be wrong.  It's cool to have an audience that has a lot of women in it, if my intuitions are true.  Insect Sex Act's audience seemed to consist of mainly dudes.  

Last Fall I talked about a situation that I didn't know if it was real or not.  I talked about having an internet presence that I didn't create myself nor did I consent to.  I still don't know if that's true or not, but one of my posts back then talked about how I no longer drank, smoked cigarettes, did drugs, or PURSUE UNAVAILABLE WOMEN.  This latest turn of events involving my books at the library might represent better times than I had last Fall.  I still don't want to chase after unavailable women, even if women reading my books marks an improvement in my fortunes.

Nothing could ruin any good deal I've made for myself more easily than trying to connect with some twenty-two year old waitress or barista in my world who would just not have any of that.  So, in good times or bad, unavailable women could make any deal suck.  Just because I may have an audience doesn't mean I get to go all Guns and Roses on the female members.

I've just finished sixty pages of my next book.  I hope to have it back from the printer and sent to wherever I'm going to send it by this time next month.  I hope it's true that I have an audience that reads the books at the library. 
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