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Having something going for me

6/13/2022

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I've talked before about one date I had in 2015 who told me she didn't compete for men, with a smirk in her voice and on her face, twice, and I've also talked about the girl from a long time ago that called me the ultimate underdog after I talked to her for the first time at a club one night.  Both of these women thought that talking to me that way would give them some advantage over me, and I decided to not have anything to do with either of them in pretty short order- even though both of these women were interested in me.  I guess a reasonably attractive woman having an interest in me doesn't necessarily do it for me like I once thought it would.  

When I think about these two women and other women who tried that kind of backhanded, disrespectful shit on me, and how they and others just assumed they had a captive audience with me and could pull that kind of thing on me, I think of other friends and ex-friends of mine who seemed to rank higher than me in the collective hierarchy of a lot of women we've all associated with at times. Yeah, these various friends and ex-friends did not and do not get that kind of treatment from a lot of women like I seem to rate.   That sucks.

The only viable solution I can come up with involves the idea that I try to have things going for me that don't involve the acceptance and approval of women.  I just completed an eight page story for a comics anthology due out later this year.  That kind of thing.  I'm taking both banjo lessons and guitar lessons.  I hope to record another album with both guitar and banjo on it next year or the year after.  That kind of thing.  When that women said to me that she didn't compete for men, my life and the way I live it shot back that she has some pretty awesome elements of my own life and personal freedom that she definitely has to compete with, and she didn't make the cut.  So that's all I really want to do about this collective attitude that I see from a lot of women who relate to me in any good, bad, or indifferent way.  I just try to make my life worth my time and attention, and if I have to educate any arrogant-attitude- having women in my world, one at a time, as to the fact of the matter, so be it.
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