Last May I had a table selling my comic books at my friends' shop for Free Comic Book Day. Towards the end of the day, this woman around forty-seven or forty-eight years of age started talking to me about the paper plates I draw my comics on. She had an interest in the idea of repurposed materials and talked about things made out of plastic. Anyway, we talked for quite a bit along these lines, and she just wouldn't go away. She wore a mask, even though the event took place outdoors, and she seemed pretty nerdy. As I broke down my table and carried stuff to my car, she even helped me with that. I tried to come off as polite, and as she helped me with a chair at my car, I blurted out, "My URL is on those comics of mine you bought, if you read them and like them, send me an email through my contact page." A little while later, she looked me up and down, for what reason I don't know, and I saw her talking to a guy who may have been her friend or her boyfriend or husband or whatever.
She did not seem to meet my usual standards as far as how good she looked, but I've been trying to work on that aspect of my game for a looong time now. She just came off as so AVAILABLE for me to approach for social reasons, that I decided, "Why not?" She never came off as if she wanted to play mean games with me, she didn't act offended when I asked her to write me, and she never tried to retaliate or otherwise make me feel bad for reaching out to her socially. Like I said, I've wanted to push the envelope in that direction for a long time now, and I just saw a chance to act on that desire in that situation. As of this writing, she still has not written me any emails, but even that aspect of it makes it feel like kind of a breakthrough.
If I continue to pursue this line of inquiry, I feel as if I will give myself some genuine options to go out with women. With someone such as that young female employee who used to work at that business I patronize, I feel as if my efforts to disengage with her after I approached her for social reasons last year constituted pushing the envelope with a goddess type in a direction I feel as if I don't push often enough. After I invited that young woman to a comic book event in late October of 2021, and she did not show up to it, and she did not display any desire to talk to me or engage with me at all at her place of employment in the weeks that followed, I decided to take my business elsewhere and also join a support group for people who suffer from love addiction. After about six weeks of patronizing another business, I decided to return, but this young woman didn't work there anymore, and I figured she had quit that job during my absence.
I said in a post titled "Physician Heal Thyself" that a woman who feels frustrated from dating womanizer types all the time might want to try giving the time of day to someone she doesn't normally give it to. I wrote that she didn't have to have sex with such men, necessarily, but that by giving such men the time of day, she could have some other experience of men other than the same one, over and over and over again. I then said in that post that I might want to try that myself, and with this woman at Free Comic Book Day, I think I did.
This one time at this Free Comic Book Day didn't mark the only time I've gone in this direction, but I still think there's plenty of room for me to go further with this line of inquiry than I can with these young goddess types. I feel as if I pushed the envelope as far as I could possibly push it with goddess types at the juncture of my dealings with Sara in 1988. I honestly don't feel as if I have anywhere else to go that I would want to go with such types, and each successive experience I have, especially since the days of that virgin girl in 2014/ 2015, just seems to reinforce this conclusion.
She did not seem to meet my usual standards as far as how good she looked, but I've been trying to work on that aspect of my game for a looong time now. She just came off as so AVAILABLE for me to approach for social reasons, that I decided, "Why not?" She never came off as if she wanted to play mean games with me, she didn't act offended when I asked her to write me, and she never tried to retaliate or otherwise make me feel bad for reaching out to her socially. Like I said, I've wanted to push the envelope in that direction for a long time now, and I just saw a chance to act on that desire in that situation. As of this writing, she still has not written me any emails, but even that aspect of it makes it feel like kind of a breakthrough.
If I continue to pursue this line of inquiry, I feel as if I will give myself some genuine options to go out with women. With someone such as that young female employee who used to work at that business I patronize, I feel as if my efforts to disengage with her after I approached her for social reasons last year constituted pushing the envelope with a goddess type in a direction I feel as if I don't push often enough. After I invited that young woman to a comic book event in late October of 2021, and she did not show up to it, and she did not display any desire to talk to me or engage with me at all at her place of employment in the weeks that followed, I decided to take my business elsewhere and also join a support group for people who suffer from love addiction. After about six weeks of patronizing another business, I decided to return, but this young woman didn't work there anymore, and I figured she had quit that job during my absence.
I said in a post titled "Physician Heal Thyself" that a woman who feels frustrated from dating womanizer types all the time might want to try giving the time of day to someone she doesn't normally give it to. I wrote that she didn't have to have sex with such men, necessarily, but that by giving such men the time of day, she could have some other experience of men other than the same one, over and over and over again. I then said in that post that I might want to try that myself, and with this woman at Free Comic Book Day, I think I did.
This one time at this Free Comic Book Day didn't mark the only time I've gone in this direction, but I still think there's plenty of room for me to go further with this line of inquiry than I can with these young goddess types. I feel as if I pushed the envelope as far as I could possibly push it with goddess types at the juncture of my dealings with Sara in 1988. I honestly don't feel as if I have anywhere else to go that I would want to go with such types, and each successive experience I have, especially since the days of that virgin girl in 2014/ 2015, just seems to reinforce this conclusion.
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