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Daria

10/11/2020

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On March 1st of this year, I ran into "Daria" at Lone Star Zine Fest.  I know Daria from Austin Clubhouse.  She invited me to a performance she planned for the next night at Hotel Vegas.  At that event, she laughed because I came off as so reluctant to ask her for contact information, and she gave me her email address.  Daria is pretty young and really cute.  She's probably about the same age as  this young woman I go on and on and on about on this blog.  

Anyway, I wrote Daria the next week and told her about my show at the Posse East scheduled for St. Patrick's Day.  She wrote back saying she couldn't come because she was sick.  On St. Patrick's Day the county closed all of the bars and restaurants due to the onset of the pandemic, so there went my show.   As we all started hunkering down for the long haul, I started shooting music videos of my songs in my apartment.  I just stood in front of a banner that reads "Richy Vegas," performed my songs on my acoustic guitar, and put up eleven videos of the songs over the course of a couple of months.

On March 31st I once again wrote Daria asking her to check out my new videos and to subscribe to my YouTube channel.  Daria never wrote me back.  I didn't want to bother her anymore, so I haven't written her since.  I saw on her Facebook page that she posted something in May, so I guess she was all right as of that time.

I think of Daria and the decisions I've made to just leave her alone in relation to the decisions I've made in relation to this young woman at this business I patronize and still see to this day.  I admit, I think about this young woman who works at this business a whole lot more than I ever thought about Daria.  But, I thought about these two tonight, and decided that I wanted to come up with some new rules about how I relate to one versus how I relate to the other.

I've decided that just because I think about this young woman who works at this business a lot more than I ever thought about Daria, that fact alone does not mean that I need to favor this young woman at this business with more attention than I favor Daria.  At least Daria is someone I know from a more social setting, I have her contact information, I have actually talked to her, I do enjoy her company, and she is very pretty in her own right.  The girl at that business made quite a number of decisions over the course of these almost two years that didn't go my way, and displayed a desire to not favor me with any kind of attention or regard that I would want.  If anything, if I were to make it a contest between Daria and this young woman at this business as to whom I choose to favor with attention, I should maybe just be a little more persistent in regards to Daria and try to write her two or three more times to see if I could get her to write me back. 

The only problem I have with that lies in my desire to no longer live my life that way in regards to how I relate to women in general.  So, if I can let go of any urge to contact Daria again to the extent that I have not even attempted to contact her in the past SIX MONTHS, I don't see why I can't show the same amount of consideration for this young woman at this business I patronize and just leave her alone to a similar degree that I leave Daria alone.




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