One thing that prevents me from identifying myself as a feminist or a male ally of feminists is the issue of calling women out on their behaviors and attitudes when I feel that I would like to do so. Another thing that prevents me from identifying myself as a feminist or male ally of feminists is the tendency these types have to label me as the bad guy and to then go adversarial on me. But let's stick to the issue of calling (certain player-type) women out on their bullshit. Actually, a woman doesn't have to be a 24/7 player type to engage in that type if behavior, either.
In 1999, when I had the desire to go off on the antagonists that I portray in Richy Vegas Comics, issue #4: "Anita, You're the Reason I'm Not In Prison," I sought the council of a now-estranged friend as to what to do. After things shook out the way they did, in other words, after Anita prevented me from doing anything that I would immediately regret, I told my friend of my desire to really tell these women off. My friend advised me not to, with these words, "You know who used to call women out on their shit, Vernon Hoe, and they hated him for it."
I followed the now-estranged friend's advice and went as far as attempting to forgive these women, because he said that the standards of behavior that they engaged in are to be expected from women these days, and that it was no big deal. That attempt to forgive these women, without any expression of remorse on their part, or any attempt by them to ask me to forgive them, I now regret. A month or two later, I depicted these women and and one of their men as victims of the Whitman massacre in the first issue of Richy Vegas Comics. That started a whole chain of attempted retributions on their part over the next ten or fifteen years, and so the vicious cycle continued.
Anyway, back to how bad it was that Vernon Hoe would call women out on their shit: lets see, this is the same Vernon Hoe who has been married to the same woman since 1995, and has a daughter that has grown up in a two parent household the whole time. Oh, you mean the daughter who is an honor student at a prestigious private high school? Why, yes, that's the one.
And my friend who told me about how bad it was that Vernon Hoe would call women out on their bullshit? I guess that it was bad for Vernon to do this because that would mean that Vernon would have no chance of getting with these women. Well, it's true that this friend has had a lot more "success" with women than Vernon Hoe. I remember in college how this other friend would brag about how he would ejaculate in his girlfriends' faces, so yeah, that kind of success. I won't go any further than to say that, because things never really got better for him on the dark stuff, and it's pretty depressing.
If anyone wants a historical example of a guy who was all about the acceptance and approval of women, rather than all about a higher moral code than the acceptance and approval of women, I suggest they google this name: Ted Bundy. A real successful ladies man, that Ted.
Now, there seem to be successful ladies men in history who actually loved women. One might want to check out the memoirs of Casanova. I hear tell that Casanova tells vividly recalled stories of bedding something like one hundred women. One reviewer I read said that the vivid detail in his recall might have reflected how he actually felt about his sex partners, He used a sheep's intestine condom during the ages before people knew that syphilis was caused by a microbe.
In 1999, when I had the desire to go off on the antagonists that I portray in Richy Vegas Comics, issue #4: "Anita, You're the Reason I'm Not In Prison," I sought the council of a now-estranged friend as to what to do. After things shook out the way they did, in other words, after Anita prevented me from doing anything that I would immediately regret, I told my friend of my desire to really tell these women off. My friend advised me not to, with these words, "You know who used to call women out on their shit, Vernon Hoe, and they hated him for it."
I followed the now-estranged friend's advice and went as far as attempting to forgive these women, because he said that the standards of behavior that they engaged in are to be expected from women these days, and that it was no big deal. That attempt to forgive these women, without any expression of remorse on their part, or any attempt by them to ask me to forgive them, I now regret. A month or two later, I depicted these women and and one of their men as victims of the Whitman massacre in the first issue of Richy Vegas Comics. That started a whole chain of attempted retributions on their part over the next ten or fifteen years, and so the vicious cycle continued.
Anyway, back to how bad it was that Vernon Hoe would call women out on their shit: lets see, this is the same Vernon Hoe who has been married to the same woman since 1995, and has a daughter that has grown up in a two parent household the whole time. Oh, you mean the daughter who is an honor student at a prestigious private high school? Why, yes, that's the one.
And my friend who told me about how bad it was that Vernon Hoe would call women out on their bullshit? I guess that it was bad for Vernon to do this because that would mean that Vernon would have no chance of getting with these women. Well, it's true that this friend has had a lot more "success" with women than Vernon Hoe. I remember in college how this other friend would brag about how he would ejaculate in his girlfriends' faces, so yeah, that kind of success. I won't go any further than to say that, because things never really got better for him on the dark stuff, and it's pretty depressing.
If anyone wants a historical example of a guy who was all about the acceptance and approval of women, rather than all about a higher moral code than the acceptance and approval of women, I suggest they google this name: Ted Bundy. A real successful ladies man, that Ted.
Now, there seem to be successful ladies men in history who actually loved women. One might want to check out the memoirs of Casanova. I hear tell that Casanova tells vividly recalled stories of bedding something like one hundred women. One reviewer I read said that the vivid detail in his recall might have reflected how he actually felt about his sex partners, He used a sheep's intestine condom during the ages before people knew that syphilis was caused by a microbe.
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