I have some things to say about that barista I've become friendly with over the past month and a half or so. I do so with two things in mind. 1) This blog may or may not provide a forum that allows me to interact with my world in a unique way. The very issue of whether or not ANYONE I interact with on a day to day basis actually reads this or not seems to provide me with a certain amount of freedom for me to speak my mind. On the one hand, I might just write these posts to an audience of none. On the other hand, maybe that barista and those around her, plus people at my job, plus other people in other places in my life; maybe a lot of those people actually read this blog, so I still feel the need to be careful about what I say. It's precisely this dilemma that allows me the freedom to speak my mind while tempering my language and preserving people's privacy at the same time.
The other thing I keep in mind is, 2) My willingness to just let this deal I have going with this barista slip through my fingers allows me to better look out for her best interests as well as mine. That's because, in my willingness to just let it all go, I display a demonstrated willingness to accept an outcome where me and this barista don't become boyfriend and girlfriend. Mind you, this willingness to let it all go doesn't just sit in my back pocket in case my ardent efforts to get with her don't work out, but rather this willingness to let the whole deal go takes a front and center position in my overall game. So no, experience tells me that a demonstrated willingness to let this kind of deal just fall by the wayside does not constitute me shooting myself in the foot.
The other day she was nice enough to ask me for social media info, and I can now contact her through that means. I took advantage of this yesterday and invited her to come out and see some friends play with their bands in the upcoming days. She said she had to work. I saw her tonight at her job, and she seemed to have the impression that I'd invited her out to a gig where I was to play. Part of me wonders whether or not, in mentioning the prospect that I was to play at the gig I invited her to, she might have been slyly hinting that she only wants me to invite her to something like that if I'm on the bill as a performer. I don't know about that, but I take that into consideration.
Well, I never made it off the farm as a musical act, so I probably won't be inviting her to any gigs any time soon. I'll try inviting her to a show like the one I invited her to yesterday one or two more times via social media messaging. Then again, maybe I won't. The real issue I have with her has to do with what she wants from me. I wonder whether or not the attention she's been paying to me this past month and a half or so really has anything to do with a desire to get to know me better. A while back I speculated to myself that she may just want me as an admirer and nothing more.
In 1985 I had very traumatic, painful experience with Veronica Ortega when she came at me with this exact same agenda. I'll give this barista more credit that I give Veronica, because (I hope) the barista probably sees me as a whole lot wiser about such things, and that I can look out for my best interests better now that I could when Veronica Ortega came at me with this agenda in 1985. If this barista has the confidence that I can look after my best interest, she may in turn have my best interests more in her heart than I feel that Veronica ever had. Nonetheless, whether or not she takes me more seriously than Veronica did in 1985, I really don't want to revisit ANY PART of those bad old days. Older and wiser, right?
The other thing I keep in mind is, 2) My willingness to just let this deal I have going with this barista slip through my fingers allows me to better look out for her best interests as well as mine. That's because, in my willingness to just let it all go, I display a demonstrated willingness to accept an outcome where me and this barista don't become boyfriend and girlfriend. Mind you, this willingness to let it all go doesn't just sit in my back pocket in case my ardent efforts to get with her don't work out, but rather this willingness to let the whole deal go takes a front and center position in my overall game. So no, experience tells me that a demonstrated willingness to let this kind of deal just fall by the wayside does not constitute me shooting myself in the foot.
The other day she was nice enough to ask me for social media info, and I can now contact her through that means. I took advantage of this yesterday and invited her to come out and see some friends play with their bands in the upcoming days. She said she had to work. I saw her tonight at her job, and she seemed to have the impression that I'd invited her out to a gig where I was to play. Part of me wonders whether or not, in mentioning the prospect that I was to play at the gig I invited her to, she might have been slyly hinting that she only wants me to invite her to something like that if I'm on the bill as a performer. I don't know about that, but I take that into consideration.
Well, I never made it off the farm as a musical act, so I probably won't be inviting her to any gigs any time soon. I'll try inviting her to a show like the one I invited her to yesterday one or two more times via social media messaging. Then again, maybe I won't. The real issue I have with her has to do with what she wants from me. I wonder whether or not the attention she's been paying to me this past month and a half or so really has anything to do with a desire to get to know me better. A while back I speculated to myself that she may just want me as an admirer and nothing more.
In 1985 I had very traumatic, painful experience with Veronica Ortega when she came at me with this exact same agenda. I'll give this barista more credit that I give Veronica, because (I hope) the barista probably sees me as a whole lot wiser about such things, and that I can look out for my best interests better now that I could when Veronica Ortega came at me with this agenda in 1985. If this barista has the confidence that I can look after my best interest, she may in turn have my best interests more in her heart than I feel that Veronica ever had. Nonetheless, whether or not she takes me more seriously than Veronica did in 1985, I really don't want to revisit ANY PART of those bad old days. Older and wiser, right?
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