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Am I for real on this?

8/1/2018

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I've stopped patronizing a food service business that employs a pretty good number of attractive women.  Soon after I quit going there, I thought it might be a good idea to not go back there for quite some time, if at all.  There's the factor of money.  I have a lot of uses for the money I could save by just fixing stuff at home rather than go to food service places for the same items.

I figure that the main reason I would patronize this one establishment has to do with feeling as if I'm a part of the game.  Hanging around those attractive young women might tend to make me feel as if I'm playing some part in the love/dating game, however  small a part that is.

That's the same reason I would go around desperately seeking love interests to hang my mind on.  Needing a love interest and needing to feel as if one plays a part in the game is not a need like food, water, or oxygen.  The word "need" does not really apply to such a desire.  Therefore, I will try my level best, one day at a time, I guess, to refrain from patronizing this particular business or businesses like it.  

​Not one woman who currently works at this business would have to worry that I'm trying to make them over into a love interest if I just stopped going there altogether.  I count about seven or eight young women at this place that could just chill out about that if I stopped going there.  I guess I will know if I'm serious in about a month or a month and a half.

My last post talked about following my Buddha.  That's what this is about.  It's not as if anyone- myself, or these employees at this one business, or anyone else- has done anything that necessitates this move.  I just want to live life a bit differently than how I'm used to living it.  A few posts ago I griped about how nothing ever changes for me.  I griped about how, no matter what the changes I've made, nothing ever changes as far as any real improvement in my relationship with women.  I guess that's debatable, but there always seems to be some kind of significant change I can make; whether it's something such as trying to refrain from staring at woman and young girls, paying attention to my personal hygiene and grooming habits, or just taking a fork in the road that I usually don't take.  The biggest room in the world; room for improvement.  It's not all about losing and maintaining a forty to fifty pound weight loss, which is hard.
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