There exists, now, two situations with women in my world that involve rejection and how I should handle it. One situation involves someone I like very much making a dating decision that didn't go my way, and the other involves young, very attractive women playing cruel rejection games with me at the behest, I believe, of that former cashier I last saw in late February of this year. The girl I like very much made a decision that was more about her personal preference for the company of someone else and not necessarily a decision she made against me. The other situation personally offends me more because I never did anything to these girls to deserve that kind of attention from them. These girls, in my opinion, acted as stand-ins for that former cashier and interacted with me in such a way as to try to make me think they spoke for her. All the while this former cashier most likely has a boyfriend and lives her life how she pleases, and so these women serve to torment me on her behalf. It comes off as quite subtle, but I think this game exists.
The game these girls were playing puts me in a very awkward position now, in large part because I don't think they want to play this game anymore, but I'm kind of stuck in my place knowing they probably don't like me, will never like me, and how I should field such behavior directed at me. The best solution I came up with on how to deal with these young women is the same solution I employ with the young woman whose decision to date someone else was, in my opinion, in no way coming from an adversarial place with me. On the one hand, I don't want to come off as emotionally hurt, pissy, or surly towards this young woman. On the other hand, a behavior I find almost as obnoxious as coming off all hurt and pissy would involve this display of what a great guy I am about this rejection and how she should just totally love me because I'm being such a great guy to her about her decision that didn't go my way. I see such a display as very manipulative.
My solution involves coming off as neither of those things. I will try to come off as neither hurt nor as some great guy about it all to any of these women in all of these parts of my world. My overall mood these days is pretty good, thanks to the psych med I'm on, the fact that I no longer drink, my efforts to employ cognitive behavior thinking exercises about such discouraging events, and my efforts to seek out support groups where I can talk about this stuff to people who share the same goals I share. My attempt to metaphorically thread this needle's eye is an attempt to move on and just continue living the life I've built up as a single person who has problems with women that often are not my fault, and in living this life I've built up and enjoy, make it really, really hard for me to fall prey to this or that scammer or con artist who seeks to exploit whatever loneliness I do still experience. And, I might add, the way I approach my life as a single man and how I relate to the women in my world makes it harder for women such as the adversarial ones I wrote about in the above sentences to bring me down very much or for very long.
The game these girls were playing puts me in a very awkward position now, in large part because I don't think they want to play this game anymore, but I'm kind of stuck in my place knowing they probably don't like me, will never like me, and how I should field such behavior directed at me. The best solution I came up with on how to deal with these young women is the same solution I employ with the young woman whose decision to date someone else was, in my opinion, in no way coming from an adversarial place with me. On the one hand, I don't want to come off as emotionally hurt, pissy, or surly towards this young woman. On the other hand, a behavior I find almost as obnoxious as coming off all hurt and pissy would involve this display of what a great guy I am about this rejection and how she should just totally love me because I'm being such a great guy to her about her decision that didn't go my way. I see such a display as very manipulative.
My solution involves coming off as neither of those things. I will try to come off as neither hurt nor as some great guy about it all to any of these women in all of these parts of my world. My overall mood these days is pretty good, thanks to the psych med I'm on, the fact that I no longer drink, my efforts to employ cognitive behavior thinking exercises about such discouraging events, and my efforts to seek out support groups where I can talk about this stuff to people who share the same goals I share. My attempt to metaphorically thread this needle's eye is an attempt to move on and just continue living the life I've built up as a single person who has problems with women that often are not my fault, and in living this life I've built up and enjoy, make it really, really hard for me to fall prey to this or that scammer or con artist who seeks to exploit whatever loneliness I do still experience. And, I might add, the way I approach my life as a single man and how I relate to the women in my world makes it harder for women such as the adversarial ones I wrote about in the above sentences to bring me down very much or for very long.
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